Does anyone else know people who oscillate among all three of these? For example, someone I know will say he wants to spend time with me. So we'll decide to do something together -- for example, go to the movies. Then we'll go through this whole charade of making plans about what to see, at what time, when to leave, etc. and for each thing he'll mumble that he doesn't know and why don't I decide (Dependent behavior). Then, when it's time to do the thing HE said he wanted to do, he either 1) goes avoidant and either suddenly can't go because of some BS thing that came up at the last minute (which he really could have done at any other time before or after) or he disappears entirely and isn't around - like he took his dog on a walk but "lost track of time" and was gone for 3 hours and hadn't brought his cell phone, etc. Or 2) he goes OCPD and starts insisting that we can't leave the house until he accomplishes this other thing (which he really could have done any other time before or after) and that thing needs to be done in a specific way, to his specific standards, which are both arbitrary and often elaborate and time-consuming, and that thing will lead to another thing, which will lead to another thing, etc. until the movie is over or it's too late to leave. But then if I say it's too late to leave and we'll have to try it some other time, he fiips again and acts like going to a movie with me was thing single most important thing in life to him and gets really upset that I "refused to go with him."

Or, if we do make it to the movie, he talks the whole way through so I can't even watch the movie anyway and so other people are getting annoyed, which is embarrassing for me.