Even more effective is when it's something out of your control or something that already happened in my past. My covert narc dad would bring up that they had paid more for my college every time he and my sister and I were together -- even when we were in our 40's.

Apparently he also tells my sister all about how I was the "gifted" one when we were kids. We both became college professors. It's also weird because our parents never got either of us tested or wanted us identified that way.

These kinds of comparisons have driven a huge wedge between my sister and I and have affected our adult relationship. So these "comparisons" can also be a method of triangulation.